. . .

my beloved 9TS has left the cave.  amen.

so here it comes . . .

Monday, the procedure failed miserably.

Tuesday, the 9TS went to the gym with his fellow gym rats and then on to lunch.

Wednesday, the 9TS had some trouble catching his breath going up and down the stairs.

Thursday, we had scans done at Moffitt . . .  and were told that his lungs were full of cancer.  So full, his blood stats were 77.  Normal is 98.  That's a big deal.  We were also told the cancer had spread to his brain.  Bottom line: two weeks.  Maybe a month.

Boom, just like that.  Tuesday he went to the gym and walked on a treadmill for an hour.  Today he is  downstairs in a hospital bed struggling to catch his breath.  He has a nurse.  He has hospice. He is on oxygen.

How can that be?

guess where we are . . .

did you guess Moffitt?  You're right!

They have stolen my sloth again to do the trial for the intercostal nerve block.  If this gives him a couple of hours of relief, they'll schedule him to come back and they'll do it again with pure alcohol instead of one of the ____caines.  It seems pure alcohol will kill the nerves evermore.  Who'd a thunk it.  But we aren't talking Wild Turkey or Stoli.  We're talking 200% proof.  Hic!

On the way over, the hungry he, was dreaming of a Five Guys hot dog and fries.  I hope he is still interested when they return him to me, because I am drooling on my keyboard thinking about a baby bacon cheese burger with lettuce, mustard, ketchup and pickles.  Burp!!!

I'll let you know how it goes when we get home this afternoon.  Fingers crossed for the sloth please!!!

ha ha ha . . .

just to prove me wrong, today is a very good day.  he's at the gym and going to lunch with the gym rats.  YAY for good days!!!!!

sigh . . .

there are lots of conversations that need to be had.   conversations no one wants to broach.  places we don't want to go.  we have help trying to open those doors but the hinges are jammed with hesitation.    this is a path no one expected to travel and it is getting painful. to watch.  to be in.  this is my man.  my heart. the pendulum has swung.  we have more bad days than good.  another round of scans and results.   results no one wants to hear. 

how could I forget . . . .

to post this shot.  Kidlet gave me her heart.

ah . . .

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you."  ~A. A. Milne

it's a stunning Tuesday.  yoga, a good lunch with good friends.  a long slumbering nap.  a new class to inhale and digest.  it is a very good day in the 100 acre woods.