or why i love her . . .

Mommy!

So it's past midnight, but I had a large coffee around 9:00 and I'm still wide awake. And though I should be doing homework (my notebook's open in front of me and the tab I'm taking notes from is still open somewhere - that counts, doesn't it?) I decided to punish myself by scrolling through your blog.

How is that a punishment, you ask? Because I went with the express purpose of looking for stories and pictures of Daddy. It's a sweet kind of torture. February starts on Sunday, and if you need me to, I will keep your flame for you as long as needed.

Because that was another story I found on your blog - the one where I fell apart, the one where you left message after message reminding me of how things get better. The one where support came flooding in from all sides.

And (speaking of stories) there is always the classic of the frog in the bathroom.

So I guess there are two purposes to this message - the original one was to bother you and ask if you wouldn't mind posting a letter from me to your friends. I realized I never thanked them for their support during my time in Wonderland.

But it turned into something else. Because who do I need to thank the most? You. Slowly, very slowly, I'm learning to see things from your perspective. I don't think I'll ever fully understand how much you do for me, but the little glimpses I get are staggering. Yes, we joke around with the conditional "How much do you love me? Enough to..." but the truth is it's an unconditional love.

It's not much when you think of it. I mean, it's just one month. But for as long as you need me, be it one month (hopefully) or longer, I will hold your hand and carry your flame. And pour you unnecessarily strong drinks. I understand I'm not always the best, I can't promise perfection, and this might come across as incredibly cheesy, but you're my mom and I love you. Unconditionally.

So, yeah.

Kidlet.