remembering . . .

i realized today how defining melanoma is.  before melanoma, i referred to my husband as Mr. D afterwards it was the 9TS.  sometimes when i know i should remember him for being the wonderful soul that he was, the thought is overshadowed by the term 'melanoma patient' and i hate that.  i feel like i was robbed all over again.

well, you can't have the memories too Mel.  i refuse.  plus i have my magic ring.  and while it wasn't working for a lot of months, it is now.  all i have to do is look at it and i see us slurping beer in Mykonos, laughing at the insanity on TV, giggling to each other like fools.

in case you are new here. one Friday night after dinner at Carrabba's, the 9TS wanted to head to the mall.  he stopped at a jewelry store.  i kept on walking because he had been put on a jewelry ban.  i'm sorry but you can only have so much jewelry if you're me.  did he listen?  no.  he remembered i had once said i would really like a three stone diamond ring.  and a three stone diamond ring is what he bought me.  he said, "when I am gone and you are sad, look at the ring and remember all the good times."

well, for seven months, it hasn't worked.  i would stare at the ring that never leaves my finger, and be sad all over that he was gone.  but slowly, it is starting its magic.  i can look at it now and remember the good times.   we were silly and goofy and in love.  i loved that about us.  and  i remember it clearly and happily.

so Mel, go stick it.  in the end, you can't rob me of what i remember best: the love of my life.