What do I say? I miss him so much I want to rage across all time . . . and I know it has yet to all sink in. But the one thing I do know is that love has crept in from across the globe. I have found nuggets of peace from friends and family, from emails, from Facebook, on my blog, phone calls, cards. Family and friends have helped lift me up. Kidlet is taking some time off from school to stay with me. Stacie, Craig and Colin help me stay afloat more than they will ever know.
His memorial service and our final goodbyes will be Monday . . . sort of. I have taken to sitting in his room and chatting to him. OK, so we all knew I was strange. It just makes me feel better. Like when I careened off a door jamb and told him to stop laughing at me . . . because he so would have. and when I went to call him to take the cork off the cork screw and realized he wasn't here . . . I told him he should do some hocus pocus and get the job done anyway. I bet he tried his best.
He was my very best friend and the love of my life . . .
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4 comments:
As hard as it is to do life without him it was equally as hard for him to leave you. The 9TS was such a cool guy and a wonderful neighbor. He will be missed by many, many people.
Paula
There is no manual for mourning. There isn't a right or a wrong. You do what you have to do to stay (mostly) sane. I hear my dad laugh at me all the time.
And there are a lot of us who are here for you if you EVER need to talk.
(((Jeanne)))
THE DASH
I read of a man who stood to speak At the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone From the beginning to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth And spoke of the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all Was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time That she spent alive on earth
And now only those who loved her Know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own--The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love And how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard; Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left That can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand The way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives Like we’ve never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect And more often wear a smile,
Remembering that this special dash Might only last a little while.
So when your eulogy is being read With your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say About how you spent your dash?
I've been thinking about every day this week Jeanne! Grief comes and goes in waves and in all kinds of ways. It's a process, miserable at best I know, but I'm glad your incredible sense of humor gives you a bit of relief and comfort. I'm so glad you've received so much support!
Many, many thoughts, prayers and hugs GF!
Jana
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